Since I am the worst possible person to ask about this (I can barely even figure out doing my day job’s everything-comes-in-a-T4 tax return, I thought I’d share a post from my friend Christine Bougie.
She is one of the busiest, most talented musicians I know and, as this post proves, one of those rare musician-types who have their shit together. So envious.
Anyways, this is the clearest, simplest set of tax time instructions I’ve ever read, and I’m sure you’ll find it just as hepful.
Phil and I, otherwise known as The I Love You Toos, were invited to perform with the Emmanual-Howard Park United Church choir one Sunday morning, in what would be my first-ever church service, and a whole load of fun.
Of course, we used this opportunity to fulfill one of our deepest fantasies… to sing I Will Follow Him a la Sister Act.
Annnnd… someone videotaped it!!!
I am reading an Alice Munroe collection of stories right now called Hateship, Friendship, Courtship, Loveship, Marriage, which is the name of an old kids counting game. However, while commuting today, it occurred to me that those words basically encompass the subject matter of the majority of albums out there. Here is my YouTube tribute to that thought:
Hey, haters!
WARNING: Ears. May. Bleed. Few things in life can be more difficult to listen to than this:
Carly Simon and Winnie the Pooh? Ya, that’s what I thought, fool:
This song kills me:
This is usually how it happens:
Sigh…if Tony Dekker, or any man for that matter, courted me with these words, there would be absolutely zero struggle in this courtship. And this is one of the weirdest lyrics videos I’ve come across on YouTube, fyi…
Best. Hair. Ever.
And one of the best songs ever.
This is what I imagine marriage to be:
Those who know me know that the main man in my musical life is Roger Miller. Those who know me and also love Roger Miller have probably already been roped into my Roger Miller tribute band.
But for those who don’t know me and/or do not know the genius of the late Roger Miller, here is a perfect introduction to one of the finest songwriters of all time….with muppet chickens!
Now THAT’S what you call a medley.
I bet this Minnesota mother-of-four had no idea she’d change the music industry when she downloaded Journey and Gloria Estefan…. haha!
via Judge reduces damages award in music file-sharing case – thestar.com.
This article just came out today:
via Michael Robertson: Apple Planning Cloud-based Music Service | Digital Media Wire.
And for some backgrounder on these said music clouds, read my blog post from last March when I was involved in a very lengthy discussion on the future of music clouds.
Read this:
I’m playing in a shite load of shows in different capacities this week and instead of posting what/where the shows are, I have decided to make a sneak peek teaser instead. If you can figure them out and you show up, I might just have a special surprise for you 
Monday, January 25
Hints: Queen West, If you love me, tell me now…
Tuesday, January 26
Hints: Parkdale, North of Queen
Wednesday, January 27
Hints: Rurban retreat, murphy bed
Thursday, January 28
Hints: My musical home, my favourite instrument
Friday, January 29
Hints: Kangaroos, National Holidays
Saturday, January 30
Hints: A TV network, a cardboard box
Sunday, January 31
Hints: Little Poland, a United Church
Before I go out on this nasty limb here and getting really effing mean/blunt about the state of music in Toronto right now, let me first state that I have a LOT of jazz and classical friends who do NOT fit into this blanket statement, and they know who they are. And the people who do, they know who they are, too.
And now, the rant:
Dear Toronto musicians:
I’m really sick of those of you who think the world a.k.a their audiences, the city/provincial/federal governments, and the everyday civilians walking by a venue, owe them for their art.
As a musician, you’d think I’d be a bit more sympathetic, but I’m not a jazz musician or classically trained. I simply do it for the love and, ahem, the art, and play weird instruments that aren’t meant to make you a living. If I had shelled out as much cash (well, loans) for music as I did for journalism school, maybe I’d be sitting on their side of the fence.
But, yes, you chose to make music your career and invested in it, just like I chose to do with journalism. You claim that “people don’t get jazz” or “don’t support classical music enough.” This could be for several reasons: One, you’re soooo brilliant that you and your genius friends are the only ones who get it. Two, your music sucks balls. Or, three, you’re simply just not playing a mainstream, popular type of music, so how can you demand mainstream appreciation? You’d think your I-have-an-extensive-knowledge-of-obscure-literature-and-art-therefore-am-smarter-than-you persona would have tipped you off to this.
I read Canadiana fiction and play the musical saw. I think the musical saw is the best instrument on the planet, but sadly, most people would disagree with me so I have no choice but to work a day job and take saw-playing gigs whenever I can.
Yes, I’m stuck playing the music I have chosen to love whenever I can, instead of yelling obscenities to crowds (or more likely, via the internet after the gig is over and you’re clear of any in-person confrontation.)
Crowd etiquette is a courtesy. It’s etiquette. It’s like chewing with your mouth open – it’s totally obnoxious and looked down-upon by the norm, but alas, people can chew however they want to. You might not invite them back to your dinner party, but hell, there’s no law against it.
Oh yes, but I forgot — it’s not just a lack of crowd etiquette that gets you all riled up. It’s that they’re cheap, too. Don’t they know that your pay-what-you-can jug is your salary, and THAT’S why you sneer at the jingle of change as it hits the plastic?
Newsflash: no. They don’t know. They don’t know that this is, in fact, your day job and that they are your sole source of income and are, ultimately, paying you slave wages. Why? Because the only people who know how Toronto’s music venues milk them dry of their talents each night and then give them a beer jug of change in return, are musicians. The same cheap-asses who let your jug pass by are probably the same ones in restaurants who don’t tip, or worse, chuck a twoonie on the table and pat themselves on the back. Being a musician in Toronto is like being a server in a restaurant without the base pay — working for tips while your “employer” gets out of giving you a paycheque.
But, is this the fault of the customer? No. You should be thankful they even chose to show up at a venue you’re playing at, because they could have gone two doors down to a bar with an XM Satellite radio feed. And, if they’re chatty and annoying, why can’t you just shrug it off as a shitty night on the job, which is a common thing in this great, big thing we call life? Or better yet, if it happens all the time, work on your banter and performance and try to captivate them?
I know, this still doesn’t solve the issue of the pay-what-you-can-jug. Sigh. I guess there’s only one thing left to do: start pointing fingers at the venues, instead of the audiences, and demand to be paid decent wages for playing in their bar. If they don’t, stop playing pay-what-you-can gigs and hope that an influx of shitty music helps make Toronto venues realize that just like the rest of real life, you get what you pay for.
Wait a second…. you’re jazz and classical musicians, aren’t you? Shouldn’t you be part of some union that demands a minimum hourly rate or something? Or are you?
Maybe you’re a singer-songwriter; a bitter, jaded artist who can’t make enough money at shows, and can’t sell enough CDs to make a living. Its soooo tragic how the world can’t seem to stumble upon the genius wrapped up in your songs, yet they’ll rush to iTunes for a Johnny Reid Christmas album.
So, you demand that the government, your MP, your arts bureau, whoever, give you the money to do it. Its ensuring Canadian culture lives on, you say. You’ll get CBC radio play, you say. It’s your right as a Canadian citizen, you say.
I’m sure every entrepreneur in this country wholly believes their niche product is so good, it will sell like hotcakes, but alas, most of them can’t make a go at it. Since you love CBC so much, watch an episode of Dragon’s Den and then take a hard look at that product, I mean, album you’re demanding an investment in.
The above brands of pretentious, self-righteous, holier-than-thou bullshit makes me want to raise a giant middle finger to Toronto’s music community instead of a glass, but I’ll end this rant on a positive note. Take a deep breath, and here are some productive things you can do instead of bitching to your peers:
Want to get paid more? Demand it. You can start here:
Want to play somewhere where your music will be appreciated?
Want to make an album that sells enough copies to make you a decent living?
Check this out:
http://www.billboard.com/charts/hot-100#/charts/hot-100
And, if all else, fails, you can always fall back on this: Workopolis.
xo
SM
I love getting press releases that WORK, and although this came through this morning, it’s already up in articles… despite it truly having no real newsworthiness/urgency. Sign of a good press release!
Why did it work? It was actually written by D-Sisive himself (aka Derek Christoff) instead of the URBNET PR team, even though it was sent through the regular channels.
It started off like this:
“Dear friends:
This is my official press release. For IMMEDIATE RELEASE. Weird.
My label (urbnet) usually takes care of these things. Take a few paragraphs from my bio. Add a sentence describing whatever it is they’re trying to promote. Throw in a quote that I spend hours carefully crafting. Bam! Press release.
Not this time. I wanted to write it myself.”
and it ended like this:
“Ps. Rappers… It’s OK to compliment other rappers.”
Looks like artists sending out press releases to give props to other artists really is news.
Love it.
http://www.chartattack.com/news/78361/new-d-sisive-single-inspired-by-anvil-dead-mans-bones
and love this:
via New D-Sisive Single Inspired By Dead Man’s Bones, Anvil | CHARTattack.
{{desc}}
It’s that easy. Thanks Canadiana.
via An Open Letter To Joel Plaskett About His New Winter Coat | CHARTattack.
